Faithful Leadership Pt 1

All right. Good morning. Glad you all are here. It's good to see everybody. I want to invite you to stand with us. We'll pray and we'll get started.

Lord, we thank you for another day. Thank you for another opportunity, Lord, to be in your house this morning. Lord, as we enter this time, Lord, of praise and worship, Lord, I just pray that we would focus completely on you, Lord, that we would sit everything, every distraction, Lord, everything that's going on in our lives aside. And to just focus on you and to lift praise to you, God, because you are worthy of all of our praise.

Lord God, you are worthy of all honor and glory, Lord. And so, Lord, now we ask that you bless this time. Lord, bless the worship and the word as it goes out in Jesus' name. Amen.

Yes, Lord God, we wait. Expect. Expectantly for you, God, we wait patiently. Man, you guys can go ahead and have a seat if you like.

Lord God, I just want to take a moment. God, I just want to say thank you, Lord, for who you are and for what you've done for us, Lord. And I thank you for the blood that you willingly spilled out on the cross. Lord, it's because of your blood that you spilled. Lord, that we... That we have redemption, that we have forgiveness, have grace. Lord God, and we just thank you for that.

Just go ahead and stand with me for the Lord. Jesus. I just want to take a moment and just say thank you, Lord, and just praise you, God.

Because nothing compares to the promise that we have in you, Lord Jesus. Nothing compares to the promise.

Free from sin, Lord, free from sorrow. And God, we look forward to the day that we can be with you face to face. And God, now as Pastor Ryan comes, Lord, I just pray that you would... Just bless him, Lord. And fill him with your Holy Spirit, God. May your Holy Spirit rest upon this place and move mightily this morning, God, in our lives. We love you and we praise you in Jesus' name.

Amen. Let's have some fellowship.

Good morning.

If you could begin to find your seat. Grab your bulletin. We'll get ready to go over some announcements.

Welcome to Calvary Chapel. I'm glad that you have joined us this morning. A handful of things to take note of in your bulletin. First of all, over on the left-hand side, those are different things to get involved in throughout the week, places to get plugged in. So find yourself a spot and get plugged in. That way you can continue to grow in your walk throughout the week.

The biggest thing to share with you, in the middle section, everything else is pretty old there. The biggest thing to share is we do have a new memory verse this week, and they always want me to say it online so that everybody hears that too. It's Titus 2, verses 11 and 12. So that's a little something for you. And then, again, if you would like to join us,

it's in our daily Bible reading program. That's on the back flap of the bulletin. So those are the things that are going on. If you would make sure that your mobile device is silenced. And for our responsive reading this morning, we are going to be in Psalm 47. Psalm 47. Looking at the New American Standard for this part so that hopefully we sound the same.

If you need the copy, there should be one in a row around you. And as you are turning to Psalm 47, if you are able, please stand in the honor of the reading of God's Word.

I will read the odd verses. If you will follow along with Pastor Allen and the even verses. Psalm 47 for the choir director. A psalm of the sons of Korah. Oh, clap your hands, all you peoples. Shout to God with the voice of joy. For the Lord Most High is to be feared, a great king over all the earth. He subdues people under us and nations under our feet. He chooses our inheritance for us.

The glory of Jacob, whom he loves. Selah. God has ascended with a shout. The Lord with the sound of a trumpet. Sing praises to God. Sing praises. Sing praises to our king. Sing praises. For God is the king of all the earth. Sing praises with a skillful psalm. God reigns over the nation. God sits on his holy throne. And read verse 9 with me. The princes of the people have assembled themselves

as the people of the God of Abraham. For the shields of the earth belong to God. He is highly exalted. And so, Father, I thank you that we've had the opportunity, Lord, to praise you in song this morning, to praise you for the greatness of who you are and the greatness of the love that you have for us. And, Father, I pray now as we continue to worship you through the study of your word,

that your Holy Spirit would be poured out on this place. Father, your Holy Spirit of instruction, Lord, that you would bring comfort where we need comfort. Lord, conviction where we need conviction, Lord. And when we're asking what direction to go, would you bring us that instruction and direction that we need? And so, Father, I thank you that we've had the opportunity to pray.

And, Father, move through this time, we pray in Jesus' name. Amen. You may be seated. And if you would, open up in your Bibles to the book of Titus, chapter 1. Titus, chapter 1. Last week, we looked at a little bit of an introduction to the book of Titus. Today, we continue on. And as we have said, all of these pastoral epistles carry with them a theme of faithfulness.

And that will continue on as we are here in the book of Titus. And so, in Titus, chapter 1, I've entitled the chapter, and we're going to do part 1 today. I've entitled the chapter, Faithful Leadership. Now, it sounds very similar to what we talked about in 1 Timothy a few months ago. And it is very similar. Because remember, Paul is writing to another young pastor

who is not only supposed to take in the information for himself and how he applies it to his church, but the other churches of the region where he ministered to. And so, what I'd like to do is I'd like to start in verse 5, and I will read for us the rest of the chapter. And then we will go through and begin making comments. So, starting in verse 5 of Titus, chapter 1, it says this.

For this reason I left you in Crete, that you would set in order what remains and appoint elders in every city as I directed you. Namely, if any man is above reproach, the husband of one wife, having children who believe, not accused of dissipation or rebellion. For the overseer must be above reproach as God's steward, not self-willed, not quick-tempered, not addicted to wine, not pugnacious, not fond of sordid gain, but a man who is not a man of his own. But hospitable, loving what is good, sensible, just, devout, self-controlled, holding fast the faithful word which is in accordance with the teaching, so that he will be able both to exhort in sound doctrine and to refute those who contradict.

For there are many rebellious men, empty talkers and deceivers, especially those of the circumcision, who must be silenced because they are upsetting whole families, teaching things they should not teach for the sake of the world. And so, according to the word of God, the prophet of their own said, Cretans are always liars, evil beasts, and lazy gluttons. This testimony is true, and for this reason, reprove them severely so that they may be sound in the faith, not paying attention to Jewish myths and commandments of men who turn away from the truth. To the pure, all things are pure, but to those who are defiled and unbelieving, nothing is pure, but both their mind and their conscience are defiled.

They profess to know God, but by their deeds they deny him, being detestable and disobedient and worthless for any good deed. And so, as Paul talks to them about faithful leadership, there's three things he's going to tell Titus that he needs to know. Number one, he's going to give Titus his purpose. Number two, he's going to give him the qualifications for good leaders.

And number three, he's going to give him the necessity for good leadership. We'll cover the first of those two today. The first one that we'll cover is his purpose. Paul, of course, starts in verse five of Titus' testimony. Titus chapter one, and he says, for this reason, I left you in Crete. Now, remember, Paul had established this church in Crete, and we don't read about it in the book of Acts

because most scholars believe that this church, or churches, were established in Crete sometime after Paul's first Roman imprisonment, which we read about at the very end of the book of Acts. And so, after that time, he went back on another missionary journey, and one of the places he went was the island of Crete, and he established these churches. Someone that was in ministry with him in that time, he went back to Crete, and in that process was this young man by the name of Titus, who, while like Timothy in age, was a little bit different than Timothy, because remember, Timothy was sort of a nervous guy. Titus seems to be a pretty bold guy.

And so, what Paul does is he reminds him, Titus, this is why I left you there. And he left him there for two reasons. The first reason why he says he left him there, notice what it says in verse five, that you would set in order what remains. That you would set in order what remains. That phrase, to set in order, means to set right. It actually, according to Warren Wiersbe,

is a medical term. And it's a medical term that means this. It's a medical term for the setting of a broken limb. And so, when he looked at the churches that were in Crete, he saw it's great that we've established these churches, but there's issues in these churches. There's a brokenness there, and the brokenness is that the doctrine and the practice aren't lining up.

And part of the reason why the doctrine and the practice weren't lining up is because they didn't have really good leadership. Because leadership is necessary in a church. And so, the first thing he left him there to do was to set things straight, to set things right, to repair that which was broken through a lack of leadership. And that brings us to the second reason why he was left in Crete.

Number two is to appoint elders in every city as I directed you. Appoint elders in every city. Essentially, what he was supposed to do is he was supposed to establish the leadership of the churches throughout the island of Crete. Right? Now, it's a wonderful idea to think that all of us as Christians could just be a part of this just wonderful time together

where we really don't have to worry about who's in charge. We don't have to worry about leaders. Can't we just all get together and just kind of trust that God's going to take care of things? We can, but the problem is we won't let God take care of things because no one's in charge. Right? And so, what tends to happen is that much like in the book of Judges,

if there's no king in the land, then people tend to do that which is right in their own eyes. Right? You need faithful men who will take the truth of Scripture, apply it to the lives of people, and then instruct in how to live. And so, he says, you need to appoint these elders in every city so that there can be some form of church structure, so that there can be some form of leadership in these churches.

Only for Titus, he had to determine what's that supposed to look like. What's it supposed to look like to appoint the right kind of leader? Because you don't want to appoint a leader who's not going to do a good job. You don't want to appoint a leader who's going to abuse his leadership. You don't want to appoint a leader who is ultimately going to cause the church to fold up.

How will he know who the right people to appoint are? So, what Paul does is he so faithfully lists out all of the qualifications for what it looks like to be a leader in the church. We call these the qualifications for elders. And if you were with us back in May, we went through this, a very similar list in 1 Timothy. And while you're probably thinking to yourself,

if I've learned it once, why do I need to learn it again? Well, it's because if it's repeated in the Bible, it must be pretty important for us to pay attention to. It must be important things for us to remember. And so, he lays out this list of qualifications. Now, I want to make two comments about this list. The first one came from David Guzik. He said, These are not just valuable characteristics for leaders,

but these are indicators of godly character and spiritual maturity. These should be present, desired, and growing, not only in the life of a leader, but in the life of every believer. And the second comment that I would like to make is this, and it came out of the head of Ryan Nichols. It says, This is not a list that demands perfection, but it is a list that demands definite attention.

Because while we'll never find anybody that perfectly fits every single one of these, we should pay attention to them because these are the character traits you're looking for in leaders. So, with that being said, let's go through the list. Now, there are 16 of these things. Now, that sounds daunting. I promise I'll try to, somebody just went, I promise I'll make it as easy as possible

for us to make it through. I did not, however, have Nick make 16 different slides. I showed him the list. I'm like, what do you think? Do we make slides? And he's like, uh, I was like, that's what I thought too. That feels like a lot of slides to make. So, you're just going to have to follow along. Use your listening ears. Use your writing hand. I believe in us.

I believe we can do this, okay? So, this is the list. Number one, a leader, an elder is to be above reproach. Above reproach. See how I lifted that straight, out of the Bible? If any man is above reproach. What does it mean to be above reproach? Well, some of your translations may even say blameless. And the idea is this. There is nothing that can be taken hold upon.

Nothing to take a hold upon. In other words, in the life of an individual that God is going to use, in the life of a leader, there is nothing that can be grabbed onto as an accusation against that individual. It doesn't mean that they're perfect. It doesn't mean they've never made mistakes before. It doesn't mean that they won't still make some mistakes. It means that when they do,

they own up to those mistakes and they deal with them immediately so that nothing can be held over that leader's head. So that nothing can be held against that individual. We all love the hero movies, right? And often times in hero movies, what's always going on in the background? There's some sort of a secret from the past. And that's what the bad guy's holding over the head of the leader, right?

I'll tell everyone who you really are. And when does he finally find freedom? When he finally says, okay, why don't I tell him? Why don't I tell him who I really am? And he reveals the deep dark secret that he'd been hiding all of those years. And now all of a sudden, no one has any power over his life any longer because he has just robbed the power because now he is above reproach

because now he is honest in all of his dealings. Now he is open about who he is. He's dealt with the issue and now he can continue to be the hero in the movie. Well, that's the way it's supposed to be with us, right? The enemy loves to hold our secret sins over our head and say, listen, somebody's going to find out. You know the best way to rob the enemy of that power in your life

is to become an open book to people because that makes you above reproach. It's not that you've never made a mistake. It's that you own up to your issues, you repent of your issues, and you walk away from them. And so the first thing he says about a leader is that they are to be above reproach. The second thing that he says is that they are to be a husband of one wife.

A husband of one wife. Now there's typically been two misinterpretations of this. The first misinterpretation of this is that they say, well, if you're going to be an elder in a church, you have to be married. Well, that would disqualify Paul and it would disqualify Jesus because neither of those guys were married, right? So I don't think it means that you have to be married

in order to be an elder in a church. The second thing that a lot of times people misinterpret is they say if you've ever been divorced, that disqualifies you from any sort of leadership or being an elder in a church. But listen, if it was either a biblical divorce, meaning it fit the biblical grounds for it, or two, they have repented of whatever led to the divorce, I believe that God is a God who restores. And I have no problem believing that God takes even individuals like that, restores them back to a place where they are not only right with the Lord, but they're right with other people, and they get put back into a position of leadership.

So if those are the two misinterpretations, what's the correct interpretation of it? Well, if you look at the word in the Greek, the phrases in the Greek, husband of one wife, is a one woman man. A one woman man. Now, in the direct context, Paul is writing to a polygamist culture. He's writing to a culture where it was not uncommon for a man to have more than one wife,

or to have a mistress on the side. As a matter of fact, it was pretty common in the Roman Empire for that to happen. And so Paul gives this groundbreaking command to anyone who is going to be an elder, you can only have one wife. Polygamy will not allow you to be an elder. But for us, in our context, since polygamy is illegal in the United States of America,

I'm pretty sure even Utah, since it is actually illegal, thank you for those that get the Mormon joke, we understand that what he's really saying here is you need to keep yourself true to your wife. An elder is to be one who keeps himself only to his wife. That means his eyes are only for his wife, that means his heart is only for his wife, and his affection is only for his wife. And I hit this hard in first service, and I'm going to hit it hard in this service, too.

Men, I'm talking to you guys right now, you need to be the husband of one wife. Right? I only have the one. Do you? Or do you also have somebody at work that you flirt with all the time? Or do you also have something online that you watch all the time? Or do you also have somebody that you pine after all the time, that you're like, oh, I really like them, I wish that was who I was really married to.

Because fellas, I'm here to tell you right now, you better repent today. Because whether you want to be an elder, or whether you just want to be a believer, God is calling us as men to be true to our wives. And I know the culture that we're living in right now. I know the culture that we're living in right now puts every temptation in front of the eyes of every man that there possibly is, and you need to decide that you are going to keep yourself true to your wife.

And it will be a commitment you have to make every single day of your life. Satan will always want to put temptations in front of you. And you have to decide every day that you love the wife that God has given you. After all, she puts up with your sorry rear end every single day, right? You should love the wife that God has given to you. And if you're in here this morning

and you're a young man, and you're not married yet, this fidelity starts today. Because the fidelity that starts today is you're not going to be some player who tries to string every single girl along to try to get as many different girls as you can. That's what you need right now. We'll be real honest with you. You know why? Because I've watched what boys do.

Boys don't care who they can have, they care who else they can have. And I'm here to tell you right now, my desire to sometimes launch a boy into Next Tuesday is pretty strong sometimes. Because I watch what they do to these girls. And it ticks me off. And so you young men sitting in here right now, if that's who you're going to be, then you need to change.

If you want to be a man that God is going to use, you need to change. You need to change your life. You will be true to a person. And it also means, young men and old men alike, you have to put away the porn. You have to get rid of it in your life. Because that is making you not true to your wife. And it's making you not true to your spouse. These things have to get put away in our lives.

Because it says, if you're going to be a leader, and I'm here to tell you right now, men, you're all called to be leaders, then you have to be the husband of one wife. And so I want you to know, The next thing he says, number three is he says, you need to have children who believe and are not accused of rebellion. Children who believe and are not accused of rebellion. What does he mean by that?

Does he mean that your kids have to be Christians? Well, at some point in time, they're going to have to make a decision for themselves. But if you can't lead your family to Christ, we do have to start asking, do you know how to lead people to Christ? It's a valid question that we have to ask. And every commentary that I read said that exact same thing. But the real question I have is this, is your household under control?

Is your household under control? And not like the thumb of control, but control meaning, do you know how to lead your household? We need people, we need men right now that know how to lead their house, that know how to pay attention to their kids, know how to, in a godly and loving way, discipline their kids, and know how to point their kids to Jesus and disciple them, because that's what we're called to do. Is it a household that's under control?

Because I'm here to tell you right now, sometimes I see households that aren't. I see kids that aren't. I see kids that aren't. I see kids that are in charge of all of the family activities. I see kids that run around wild and nobody pays attention to them. I see those things. And I find myself going, that's somebody I probably couldn't put in leadership because I kind of see what's going on right now.

And it's an easy thing to remedy. Well, it's kind of easy. It's not really that easy. But it does have to be remedied. And listen, I'm not saying kids have to be perfect. I'm raising two of them right now, and they're not perfect. And I guarantee one of them sitting in this room right now is like, right back at you, Dad, because it's true, right? Like, I don't need perfect.

We don't need perfect kids. But we do need men who know how to be in control of their families and know how to lead their families. The third thing that he says is that, or excuse me, the fourth thing that he says is they need to be above reproach as God's stewards. Notice what it says in verse 7. For the overseer must be above reproach as a steward of God.

Now, I find it interesting that he, for the second time in this chapter, just said that they need to be above reproach. That should tell you something, because in my studies, so far in the pastoral epistles, this is the fourth time that we're told that a leader in the church of God needs to be above reproach. First of all, it was said of elders in 1 Timothy. It was said of deacons in 1 Timothy.

It was said of elders in Titus. And now it's said a second time of elders in Titus. That should tell you that it must be a pretty important thing that you live a life that is above reproach. But do you notice what they're supposed to be above reproach in this second time? They're to be above reproach as a steward of the house of God. Now, the word steward means a household manager.

And you know what? A household manager at the time that Paul was living was a slave who was literally in charge of the affairs of the house. And he had one job, implement the will of the master in the house. He was not to implement his own will, his own rules, his own desires. He had to implement the will of the master in the house. And that's, if you're going to be a leader, what you're supposed to do.

That means you can't come up with your own plan. You can't come up with your own ideas. You can't come up with your own rules. You implement what God has to say because it's God's house. We're not building our kingdom. We're building God's kingdom. We're not building some man's kingdom. We're building our kingdom. And that should be what all of the focus is on.

That they are to be above reproach as a steward of the household of God, as a manager of God's household, understanding that it's God's house, not mine. Number five, he says that they are not to be, self-willed, not to be self-willed. The idea behind self-willed is self-centered or determined to have your own way. Self-centered or determined to have your own way.

Now, I want to tell you something. If an individual is self-centered and determined to have their own way, they have not really understood what it means to be a disciple of Jesus Christ. Because you know what Jesus defined as a disciple of his? He said, if anyone would come after me, let him deny himself. Let him take. Take up his cross and let him follow me.

That does away with my self-centeredness and it does away with my self-determination. It's no longer, I'm going to do what I want to do. It's I'm going to do what God wants me to do. It's no longer, I'm going to live to serve myself. It's I'm going to live to serve God. And then I'm going to live to serve others because that's what God calls us to do. Because that's what a disciple of Jesus Christ is identified as.

And so listen, whether you want to be a leader in a church or whether you want to be a leader in your family or whether you want to be a believer in Jesus Christ, it means that you need to be a disciple, which means you can't be self-willed. Too many of us, we just are determined to go our own way. We're just bent on it until we finally come to a place of saying, I give up my will, I'll follow yours. And then God says, oh, now I can use you.

As a matter of fact, I don't remember which one I said this on, but I'm going to throw it into this one. If I get later and I'm like, oh, that's, I should have said it there. I'll throw it in again. One of the things that I have had to learn is that if you are going to be a disciple of Jesus Christ, One of the things that I have had to learn is that if you are going to be a disciple of Jesus Christ, if you are going to be a leader, you must first learn to be led.

If you're going to be a leader, you have to first learn to be led. In other words, if you don't know how to follow directions, you don't really know how to properly give directions because you don't know what authority really looks like. And one of the biggest things that I had to learn early on in ministry is that my job was to first of all submit myself to God, and then my job was to submit myself to my pastor if I was going to serve underneath of him. Before I became the senior pastor here, I served in two other, I was the college leader up at Calvary Chapel of Johnson County, and I was the youth pastor here.

I served under two wonderful pastors, Pastor Rick Jardine up in Johnson County, who's home with Jesus now, and Pastor Mark Fry here, who's home with Jesus now. Wonderful men of God who were faithful to God's word and faithful leaders. And I knew I had to do something. The one thing I had to do was not come up with my own plan for how I thought things needed to be done, but to follow what they wanted.

I could put my input in sometimes, but at the end of the day, my job was not to be self-willed, my job was to submit myself to God, and to submit myself to the leadership that was there. Because that truly prepared me to be in the position that I'm in now. And I'm here to tell you right now, there's a reason why I couldn't become a pastor at the age of 25. It's because I was too self-willed.

I hadn't learned to submit myself yet. I hadn't learned to submit myself to the authority of God and the authority of a pastor. And so I had to learn that process. It took me until I was 37. It just is what it is, right? And so this is the learning process. He says they're not to be self-willed. No. Number six, they're not to be quick-tempered. The word quick-tempered means easily angered.

That feels fairly self-explanatory. Number seven, not addicted to wine. All right, now's where I get to make people mad.

Ironically, he takes a drink of water. The Bible has a lot to say about alcohol. There are places in the Bible where it speaks of alcohol as us having freedom to partake in it. There are places in the Bible where it speaks of alcohol as one of the worst things that you can partake in. There are places in the Bible that say, talk about the fact that alcohol is for celebrations.

And there are places in the Bible that talk about the fact that alcohol will lead you down a path that's almost irrecoverable from. So you have to be careful the way that you handle this. We were talking about this in men's breakfast yesterday. My past experience, not only in my own life, but in the lives of the people that are around me, is that alcohol usually leads down a really bad path.

There's just something about seeing people passed out in the bathtub that starts to make you think, maybe this is a bad idea. And that's my experience of seeing things like that. So I look and I go, I don't know why anybody thinks that there's room for that in the life of a believer, because that's what I was set free from. It's not something that I want to partake in.

It's what I've seen other people set free from. It's not what I want to see people partake in. That being said, there's freedom in Christ to do what you want to. My question is always this. Are you using your freedom as a cloak for unrighteousness? Also, we know that the Bible says that all things are profitable for me, or all things are lawful for me, but not all things are profitable.

All things are lawful, but not all things are beneficial. And so you have to ask yourself, is it beneficial? Is it helping me in my walk with Jesus? The direct context here and what it actually says is that they are not to be given to much wine. In other words, they are not to be a drunkard, because the Bible is very specific about the fact that getting drunk is a sin.

That's not what's supposed to happen. But I'll always ask you the question, does it help you in your walk with Jesus, or does it hurt you in your walk with Jesus? Because as A.W. Tozer said, And so he says they are not to be given to much wine. Again, not everybody agrees with me on some of the things I said. And again, you're entitled to be wrong. So as we move on to number eight,

not pugnacious, not pugnacious. All right, you guys want to take a little trip into Ryan's brain here for just a minute? All right, join me if you will. Not pugnacious. Every time I've read this word, and this is only the second time, I've ever used this word in a sentence. I guess it's the fourth time, because there were two services back in May, and two services.

It's the fourth time I've used this word in a sentence, but it's all been in teaching passages like this. But when I hear the word pugnacious, you know what I think of? A pug dog. Just a smash-nosed dog that looks kind of wrinkly. And it's funny, because this word is about being a bruiser. That's what the word literally means. The word pugnacious means a bruiser or quarrelsome.

And all I can think of is an angry pug dog that's just ready to tear you limb from limb. That's absolutely not the proper picture, but that's what goes through my brain. He says, not pugnacious. Now, it's interesting when we pay attention to this word, because the word, again, means a bruiser or quarrelsome. But the idea behind it in the Greek is this. They are not violent in their action,

but listen, they are also not violent in their speech. Now, a lot of us would probably say, that's right, you should not be violent in the action that you have in your life. You shouldn't be a fighter. But the Greeks expanded this word. They started to also apply it to speech. And in the world that we're living in, especially the church world that we're living in,

I think that's important for us to pay attention to when it comes to leadership. Because do you know what keeps happening in the church world today? More and more church abuse gets uncovered. Where we find that pastors and leaders are using abusive speech to try to control people. One of the first big ones, of course, was Mark Driscoll up in Mars Hill. And I'm not calling out something

that's not already incredibly public. There's a whole podcast. There's a whole podcast about it. But he was one of the first ones. And since him, since he was kind of pointed out as being this way, a lot of other pastors have fallen in it. And it's not because of some gross immorality in their life. It's because their speech is so violent and controlling in the way that they handle people.

It's abusive in the way that they handle people. And one of the things I've had to learn, and I'm in the process of learning, is that the words that I say matter to people. And I have no idea why, but they do. But once you're given a pulpit, your words matter to people. Not only from what I say up here, but what I say to people, in private or in conversations that I have with them.

And I'm a very sarcastic person. And I've realized that sometimes I've hurt people's feelings. And if I've ever done that to you, I'm really sorry. I wasn't trying to be abusive in my speech. I was trying to make a joke. It was just poor, right? It's a really bad joke, and nobody made sense. And so I know that that's the case. And I'm going to try not to be as sarcastic,

although it's going to take me some time. But I know that I have to be careful with the words that I say. And anybody that I put in any sort of a position of leadership, if they're always berating people, I've got to remove them. Because that's not the way that we should be. But again, I'm going to speak a word to you moms and dads in here. This one isn't just for dads.

This is for moms and dads. Your speech carries weight with your kids. And when your speech is abusive in nature, when it's constantly tearing down, that starts to affect kids, right? The things that we say affect people. I think one of the worst statements we ever used to say is, sticks and stones can break my bones, words can never hurt me. I guarantee, I don't care what age you are right now,

I don't care if you're a part of the boomer generation, the Gen X generation, whatever generation you're a part of now, millennial, Gen Z, I don't know what all we are. I think I named them all, but I think there's probably more. You all remember something that someone said to you, probably at a young age, that altered the way that you view yourself. That altered the way that you think about yourself, right?

And you can go back to like the fourth grade. You can be like, I remember when so-and-so called me fat. Or when so-and-so said I was stupid. Or when so-and-so said I couldn't do this. And that affected me. And I quit doing it. And I quit doing it. And I quit doing it. And I quit doing it. And I quit doing those things because they told me I was bad at it. I know because I talk to people.

And you guys share those things with me. And so our speech is important. The things that we say matter to people. And so he says, I can't have somebody that's a leader that is pugnacious, that looks like an angry dog. And so then at number nine, not fond of sordid gain. Not fond of sordid gain. The idea behind that is a desire to get rich, even if it's dishonest.

A desire to get rich, even if it's dishonest. Listen, so many pastors have fallen because they have come to a place of saying, I think I care more about money than I care about people. And so they start to find ways to try to make more money. As a matter of fact, this is an issue that Paul addresses here because later on in the chapter, you'll find that when he warns the false teachers, he says they do what they do because of a desire for sordid gain, a desire to simply make money.

And so he says that this is a major issue. Matter of fact, one of the great men of God of our generation, Billy Graham, never read about a scandal about the guy. You know why? Because early on in his ministry, he saw some potential for issues. He saw that he was dealing with human beings who were tempted by the things of the world. And he saw God was growing the ministry.

And so he called a meeting of all of the men that served with him. And he said, men, there's a philosophy that we're going to live by. And the philosophy is threefold. Don't touch the money. Don't touch the women. And don't touch the glory. We will guide our ministry by that philosophy. And he said, you know what? You never read about anything of a scandal of the Billy Graham evangelistic people

because they lived by that philosophy. You know, when he died, we didn't all go, what's going to come out? Nothing bad came out because he lived according to a philosophy. So he says, I need my leaders to be not fond of sordid gain. Now he moves into what they should be. That was all the negative. This is what you can't be. This is what you should be. Number 10,

he says, they should be hospitable. They should be hospitable. The word hospitable, it means to love the stranger, to love the stranger. But can I put it to you in Ryan's vernacular? If you want to be in ministry, you got to love people. If you want to be in ministry, you got to love people. I have been around ministry since I was a tiny kid. I was kind of born into it

because my dad was in ministry from the word go. So as soon as I was born, I was around pastors. And I always remember growing up hearing this one phrase over and over again, ministry would be great if it weren't for the people, right? They weren't talking about any of you people. They were talking about other people that you've never met, before in your entire lives.

But you know what you call ministry without people? A podcast, right? Like that's all that that is. That's not ministry. That's a radio program. Wouldn't it be, every now and then it's like, man, a radio program would be great. I just teach and then I leave and I don't have to hear anything. So I love you all dearly. Nobody gives me any trouble here. But you got to love people.

One of the 297,000 bad things that happened to us because of COVID is that we didn't have a ministry and we stopped being around people all the time, right? And for those of us that are people people, that's me, I'm a people person. It was the worst thing that happened to us. We were just like, I just want to be around the people, right? Because I do. I just like talking to people.

My family hates going to the store with me because I run into everybody in the world that I know and I'm like, hey, like, hey. And they're like, oh. So they hate going to the, some of y'all don't like people and you were living your best life during 2020. And when it went back, it was like, does it gotta? Because I'm pretty sure I just found my happy zone, right?

Y'all are laughing because you know it's true. But if you want to, if you want to do ministry, you got to, you got to love people. But also if you want to be a part of the body of Christ, you got to love people because you are now all a part of a giant family. Do you know that? The day that you became born again, we all became your family. And as my good friend, Jerry Horton used to always say,

you can pick your friends and you can pick your nose, but you can't pick your family, right? Because I know some of y'all looking around going, I didn't pick you. You know what they're saying to you? I didn't pick you either, right? Jesus did. And now you get to be family. So you should learn to love each other because you got to love people. Be hospitable.

Number 11, he says, you should love what is good. They should be loving what is good. Yesterday at men's breakfast, we talked about this. I want you to write down the margin of your Bible or somewhere if you want to. You should, I think it's a good idea. You should write down Romans 12, 9. Romans, R-O-M-A-N-S, Romans 12, dot, dot, 9. It wasn't up on the screen,

so I wrote it for you in the air. Romans 12, 9, because this is what it says. Paul, in talking to the Romans, says, let love be without hypocrisy. Abhor what is evil. Cling to what is good. That's the idea of what he says, loving what is good. That word cling means to fasten to or adhere to like glue. That means that as a believer, as a believer in Jesus Christ,

and as a leader of your family, and as a leader in the church, what we're looking for is people who cling to the good things in life, who love what is good, who want to shun the evil things and hold on as tight as they can to all of the good things that God has given to us. As a matter of fact, Paul will go on in the book of Philippians to say that you should think about those things. Meditate on all of those things because that's truly where growth in your life comes from. Loving what is good.

Number 12, he says that they are to be sensible. They are to be sensible. The idea behind the word sensible is sober-minded. Sober-minded. Able to think clearly and with clarity. Able to think clearly and with clarity. The idea is this. You need to discern the situation so you know the right way to handle it. Let me give you a little bit of an example. When I was still teaching

at Ark City Christian Academy, both high school, and junior high kids, I always had to make a determination. I did this first service. I'm going to do this second service too. A little sidebar here. School starts, right? For some of y'all, school started last week. Sorry, RIP. For some of you guys, it starts this week. But teachers are going back to school too.

And listen, elementary school teachers, man, they just love life, right? They're just hanging out with kids, doing their thing. High school teachers, man, they get to talk to these almost adults, and yeah, they got problems. But dude, then there's middle school teachers, right? Y'all go to war every day, right? Like, every day is a battle for you. We drove up to Derby yesterday,

and we drove by the high school, and the high school's this really nice looking place, spreading campus. And then you go by the middle school. Why does every middle school look like a prison? Have you ever noticed that? Every middle school looks like a prison. I helped remodel one when I was working construction up in Kansas City, and it was called Trail Ridge.

You know what everybody called it? Jail Ridge. Well, you know why? Because it looked like a stinking prison. You know why it looks like a prison? Because you're at war with prisoners. Right? It's just, I love y'all junior hires, okay? But you're a vibe of all your own, and it's serious, right? I saw this meme the other day, and it shows like an elementary school teacher

dressed in like all of these like feathers and flowers and stuff like that, and they look like happy as a lark. And it shows the high school teacher, and he's like dressed like a professor. And then it says, and this is the middle school teacher, and it's the guy from Jurassic World with the whip in his hand and dinosaurs coming at him. It's like, yep, that's the real MVP right there because he is going to war.

Well, anyway, all that to say, pray for middle school teachers because business gets real this week. When I taught high school and junior high at Ark City Christian Academy, I always had to identify what my class was really like, which ones can handle humor and which ones cannot. Because some of them, I can start to tell jokes. I can allow them to reciprocate some of those jokes.

We can laugh, and we can get right back to the Bible. And then there was all of the rest of the classes. Listen, some of y'all go to church here now, and I love you guys, but you know exactly what I'm talking about, right? Right? You can't bring them back. Like once you tell one joke, game over for a week, right? You are never, that joke will get brought up every day in class

for the rest of the week. And you had to determine. I had to be sensible enough. I had to have the clarity to know which class could handle it and which class didn't. That's kind of the idea of what he's saying here about being sensible. You have to have the discernment to know the right way to handle situations because everyone's different and everything is different.

And so he says, if you're going to be a leader, you have to be sensible. You have to be sober-minded. And the way that you handle yourself. Number 13, you have to be just. The word just means upright and virtuous. The idea is right in your relationship with your fellow man. Right in your relationship with your fellow man. Listen, you should be just in your dealings.

Kind to those who need kindness shown to them. Truth to those that need truth told to them. Compassion to those that need compassion. But a life that is right with your fellow man. Not only as leaders, but as believers. In Jesus Christ. Number 14, he says that you need to live a life that is devout. Some of your translations may say holy. I actually prefer that translation of that word.

But the idea behind holy and devout means undefiled by sin. And if just means right in your relationship with your fellow man, then devout means right in your relationship with God. That you are above board. That you are righteous. That you are undefiled by sin in your relationship with God. And then number 15, and I'm going to camp out on this one for just a second.

Self-controlled. Self-controlled. The word can also be self-discipline. And I love the way the Amplified Bible put this. It said, to be self-controlled is to be above reproach in public and in private. To be above reproach in public and in private. Listen, we can all do a really good job of putting the right face on when we come to church, right? We can all do a really good job

of when we're out amongst people, we put all of the right things on. We make sure that everybody knows that we're living right and that we're doing what we're supposed to do. I bet some of y'all on the way to church this morning, you were smacking your kid with a hairbrush until you got to the front door. And then you were just like, praise Jesus, right? Welcome to church.

We're so glad to be here. I don't know why that's always Southern in that moment, but it just feels right, right? Like it's a Southern mama that's beating you with a brush, right? And so we do a great job of making ourselves look great to everybody else. But behind closed doors, what goes on? You see, self-control says, I'm gonna live a private life the same way that I live a public life.

And both of them will be right with God. So if being just means being right in your relationship with your fellow man, if devout means being right in your relationship with God, then self-controlled means being right with yourself, being right in your relationship with yourself and handling yourself the way that you are supposed to. And then number 16, look at this, we made it. That wasn't nearly as bad as you thought it was gonna be, huh?

We're gonna camp out on this one for a minute though. Able to handle the word. Able to handle the word. I want you to look down at verse nine. I'm gonna read this one to us real quick. Verse nine says, holding fast the faithful word, which is in accordance with the teaching, so that he will be able both to exhort in sound doctrine and to refute those who contradict the word.

Contradict. There's three things that he tells us there about being able to handle the word. The first is that we are to hold fast to the word. Hold fast to the word. That means how do you deal with the word in your own life? Do you take it in and make it a part of who you are? Do you take it in and hold fast to it and apply it to your life? Because that's the first part of handling the word correctly.

You see, I can't teach you what God's word has to say until I first deal with what God's word has to say with me. That's why studying, for a pastor, is hard. Because if I'm gonna deliver to you a hard message, just know that the Holy Spirit delivered it to me first. If you feel smacked around by the Holy Spirit with what the word of God has to say, just know that he smacked me around first.

And sometimes it's hard. And sometimes you study and you just have to stop for a minute and go, dude, I gotta repent of something. Like I've got to deal with that in my heart because that's an issue I'm having right now. So you have to be able to handle God's word properly by holding fast to it. And then not only allow it to do its work in changing your heart attitude,

but then allow it to do its work by changing your actions that were caused by your heart attitude. And so he says, first of all, hold fast to the word. But the second thing to handle God's word correctly is that we are to be able to exhort. That means to teach and instruct. That means that if you're gonna be a leader in a church, you should be able to teach and instruct other people

what God's word has to say. You know one of the best ways that you should start, if you wanna be a leader, I'm gonna tell you right now, and this is the beginning of my plug, for next week because we need Sunday school teachers. If you wanna be a leader in the church, you're one of the best places that you can start. Go teach the kids down there. First of all, they're great.

They will ask you questions that you will not know how to answer. And that's fantastic because that's gonna teach you to study. And it's gonna teach you that it's okay that you don't always have the answers. Because people come to me all the time and they have questions, and I'm like, that's a fantastic question. Actually, somebody texted me not long ago. I left them hanging on this.

We had to meet later. They said, send me this question. It was really late at night. That was a deep question. I'm like, well, that's gonna require more than a text. I actually don't have the thumb space to text that whole thing out. And I said, that's a great question. Send. Later they were like, dude, what the heck? Like, yeah, I know it's a great question.

That's why I asked it. Like, okay, yeah, we should probably get together and talk about that sometime. It's okay to not always have the answers. Just to say, I'm gonna have to look that up. Or I'm still praying about that myself. My daughters are great at asking me those kinds of questions. I'll always go back to three-year-old Violet. Three-year-old Violet who said,

Daddy, how can God be God? How can Jesus be God? And how can the Holy Spirit be God? And I said, well, sweetie, that's the doctrine of the Trinity. And she goes, huh? And I said, okay. And I started trying to explain the Trinity. I'm like, using all of the best things that I can. And she's like, I still don't get it. I'm like, same-sies, right? Okay, like, welcome to the theological club

because we're all still having a hard time with it. We just believe it. We believe it because the Bible says it, not because we are. We always get it. And she still to this day asks me questions like that. And it's great. But Albert Einstein once said, if you really want to know it yourself, learn to explain it to a five-year-old. That's a great thing to do.

Get to where you can teach kids. You know some of the best theological resources I've ever read? Kids books. Because they put God's word on a level that's understandable to everyone, including people like me. The guy that started Calvary Chapel, his name's Chuck Smith, and I love listening to him because his, his philosophy of teaching is to simply teach the word of God simply.

And I came across, I follow the word for today, which was his ministry on Instagram. And I came across this reel the other day. And he just took a verse and he just simply expounded it. And I thought, man, this is so fantastic. It was the verse where Jesus says, come unto me all you who are weary and heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me.

For I am meek and lowly of heart, and you will find rest for your souls. And he said, let's look at that verse. He said, come unto me. That's the start of your spiritual journey. He said, take my yoke upon you. That's you learning to surrender to Jesus and learn of me. That's the lifelong process of learning what God's word has to say to us. And I was like, dude, he didn't use big words.

He didn't use fancy thoughts. He just simply said what that verse said in the most simple way possible. And I thought, Lord, I just want to keep being more like that. Because that's what it means to be able to exhort and instruct people, is to teach them the word on a level that they understand. But not only that, not only to be able to exhort and instruct,

but also to correct those who contradict, to correct those who contradict. In other words, if somebody comes with something that is opposed to what God's word has to say, you not only have to stand against it, but you have to correct it. And if you're gonna be a leader, you're gonna have to learn to correct those who contradict what God's word has to say. And I'm here to tell you right now, lots of people wanna contradict what God's word has to say.

Some of them are outside of the church, some of them are inside of the church. Because a lot of people outside of the church don't wanna follow what God's word has to say, but a lot of people inside of the church don't wanna follow what God's word has to say. And you have to be willing to contradict those things. I love, I don't remember who I read this from, but I wrote it down, and I probably wrote it down when I wasn't paying too close of attention, but I loved what it had to say.

It said, a pastor or an elder needs to be a soldier and a shepherd, able to nourish, to teach, and to defend. And if you wanna be a pastor, if you wanna be a leader in God's church, that's what you have to be. With some people, you have to be a shepherd. You have to be a shepherd who cares for them and nourishes them, who comes alongside them and loves on them when they're hurting and listens to them when they need to talk and pours God's word into them when they need a good word from the word and is compassionate with them and is tender with them and feeds them and takes care of them.

Sometimes you have to be that tenderhearted shepherd, but gosh darn it, sometimes you gotta be a soldier and you gotta be willing to shoot. You gotta be willing to take something out because anything that is an enemy of the work of God and the life of a believer is something that has to be dealt with. And it's a hard thing to be a soldier and a shepherd at the same time, which is why you need discernment, which is why you need to be sensible. Because sometimes you gotta be able to shut down the false.

And that's a hard thing to do. I'm not a confrontational person. I don't like dealing with that sort of thing. But gosh darn it, when it comes up, I gotta deal with it. And when somebody comes to me with something false, I gotta say, unfortunately, that's not in the Bible. And unfortunately, it's false. And I can't continue on allowing you to either teach that

or even think that because it's so opposed to what God's word has to say. He says, you need to be able to handle the word of God. And so he lays out those 16 qualifications for an elder, the 16 qualifications for a leader within a church. So I wanna close with three thoughts, three things that I wanna close with. Number one, these should be the qualifications for any leader.

You should be able to look at any of us that are leaders in the church and know that these qualifications are either present, desired, or growing in our lives. None of us are gonna be perfect, but you should be able to say, if you don't see one of these qualities, why don't I see this in the life of this person? Because we all are held accountable by the body of Christ. The second thing I wanna say is this.

These should be the qualifications for the leader in the home. Again, fellas, I'm gonna talk to you for just a minute. Are these things present or growing in your life? Because if you're gonna be the leader of your home, then you need to take a look at this list and start thinking, where do I need to grow? What are some areas that I need to continue to move forward in?

Because I wanna be the proper kind of leader for my home. I wanna be the proper kind of leader for my family. All you ladies in here, you need to hold your husbands accountable to this. You wives, hold your husbands accountable to this. And you need to do it in two ways. Number one, you need to make sure that they know this is what is required of them, that this is what it looks like to be a leader in the home,

and this is the standards you're gonna hold them to. But also, unleash them to be able to do that. Give them the freedom to be the leader in the home. Because sometimes I see wives do one of two things. Either one, they won't hold their husband accountable, or two, they hamstring him because they've emasculated him. And they've said, you're not a very good leader.

You're never gonna be a very good leader. I'll just do it. And you may never say those words, but by the actions that take place in your life, by the way that you live, you have told your husband, you're never gonna be good enough. I'll just do it. Don't do that to them. Give them the freedom that they need to be the men that God has called for them to be. And you young men that are in here that aren't married yet,

you need to look at these and go, this is what your wife should be looking for in you. The future young woman that you're gonna marry, this is what she wants to see. You young ladies, look for guys that look like this. Look for guys that have these sort of characteristics because those are the ones that are gonna lead you. Those are the ones that aren't going to abuse you.

Those are the ones that are gonna love you. And not only those, number three, these are characteristics that should be growing in the life of every one of us as believers. Amen? Let's all stand. And if you'd bow with me. Father, I thank you for your word. Lord, I thank you that it's a lamp to our feet and a light to our path. Lord, that it instructs us. Lord, it challenges us.

But Lord, it also gives us everything that we need to learn and to grow. And so Father, as we take in the truth of your word, I just ask that your Holy Spirit would continue to be patient with us and that you would continue to instruct us and to guide us and to lead us and that your Holy Spirit would empower us to be the men and women that you've created for us to be. And so Lord, be with us as we go out from here. Move in our lives as you see fit.

Draw us near to you. In Jesus' name, amen. Be blessed. God, I just thank you that you are the same. Never change. That you are the same yesterday, today, and forever, Lord. And Lord, today as we leave, I just pray that your Holy Spirit go with us as always and just continue to minister to our lives, Lord. God, change us. Make us look more like you. We love you.

We praise you in Jesus' name. Amen. You guys have a wonderful week. God bless you.