Good evening. I want to welcome you all to Calvary Chapel this evening. Those of you here live and those of you joining us online, we just want to welcome you this evening. Would you stand with me on this first song? Would you join me in prayer, please? Father, we thank you for this opportunity to worship in song this evening, Lord, to come before you, come into your presence. Of course, we're always in your presence because you're always,

you're omnipresent, you're all present. But we gather in this particular location to worship corporately, to come before you, to honor you, the Lord, the God who loves us, the God of the universe, Jesus God. Father, we praise you. We ask for your blessing on our service tonight.

Lord Jesus, I think of this next song, Behold the Lamb of God. We know it's John, Lord. He was, he was just standing there with the boys there and he looked over, told them, the boys, he said, Behold the Lamb of God. But you know, earlier in his mother's womb, when Mary walked into where Elizabeth was pregnant with John the Baptist, and Elizabeth spoke, the mother of her was willing to, his diaper changed, his mother, feel the love of his mother, and Father God sent him so he could live among us, not sinning, so he could die in our stead without Christ for nothing.

Everything we try leads to nothing coming to this earth. So let's just sing that as we'll be studying the scripture tonight. Oh, David. Oh, they weren't perfect boys, just like all of us, men and women, but they were looking to a Savior that was coming. You see, Jesus Christ. We look back to the cross and we think about Christ. We look back to the cross and we think

about Christ. We look back to the cross and we think about Christ. We look back to the cross. Christmas, and we reflect on his birth, but you see, Christmas has to include the cross, amen, and the resurrection and the ascension, where he is up in the right hand of the Father, making intercession for you. It makes us want to just come, just worship him,

continue in this worship service, studying your word. Lord, I want to bring before you the youth group leaders, that you would bless them as they lead youth and bless kids. Give them hearts for you, Lord. I want to lift up those doing the children's church section, those teachers in that area, that you would bless them and give those youngsters listening ears to hear, Lord. And Father, as the folks are in the nursery with the little ones, bless their time,

too. Lord, be glorified in all that we do tonight. We give you praise. We thank you, Lord. And now, as Pastor Ryan will be coming up to teach your word, would you anoint him by the power of your Holy Spirit to bring forth the glory of Jesus Christ? Amen. With your word, with your power and clarity, Lord, and that you would fill us afresh with the Holy Spirit tonight, overflow us, and give us those listening ears, eyes to see, hearts to

perceive, that which you have for us from your word tonight, that we can, through the strength of the Holy Spirit and the guidance of the Holy Spirit in our lives daily as we're living this Christian praise. In Jesus' name, amen. Amen. The Lord bless you all.

Second Samuel, chapter 13. Second Samuel 13. And then if we could get some lights up a little higher. Oh, there it is. Beautiful. All right. Second Samuel 13. Now, it's been a little while since we've been in the book of Second Samuel. So just to catch us all back up to speed. David, as the king, had done so many good things. Life seemed to be going very well for him. He had done so many good things. He had done so many good things. He had done so many

good things. He had done so many good things. He had done so many good things. He had done so many good things. He had done so many good things. He had done so many good things. He had done so many lots of accomplishments were being made. And then one fateful day, it was in the time when the kings go to war, David decided to stay home. And when he stayed home, he found himself caught up

in lust. And as he was caught up in lust, he gave in to sin, and he had an affair with Bathsheba. And after the affair with Bathsheba, he knew he had to hide his sin, or at least he felt like he had to hide his sin, because she became pregnant through the affair. And so he orchestrated a series of events to hide the sin. And so he orchestrated a series of events to hide the sin.

events to where ultimately the husband of Uriah, or the husband of Bathsheba, Uriah, would be put to death. So if you will, he covered his sin with murder. And while at the time it seemed like he got away with it, we were given one little verse that sort of told the story, and that's that God was displeased with what he had done. And so Nathan, the prophet, was sent to David with a story to tell. And that story convinced David that he was living in sin.

He'd been hiding it for about a year. And after that year, he finally came to the place where he owned up to what he had done. He confessed his sin to the Lord. And God said, I will forgive you, but there are consequences. Because though we can choose our sin, we cannot choose our consequences. And though God forgives, and we are still his children, there are still

consequences. There are consequences that we face. Part of those consequences was that the child that would be born to he and Bathsheba would be taken from him. And the rest of the consequences would be that the sword would never depart from his house, that there would always be some form of strife in the home of David. And that's exactly what we start to see take place in chapter 13. As a matter

of fact, chapters 13 through about 19 all really surround one particular individual within the home of David, one of his sons named Absalom. Which is why I've entitled tonight, Absalom part one, because really everything that takes place now is going to surround this man. And ultimately a rebellion that he will seek to lead against his father. But the story of Absalom actually begins with a story of Absalom's sister Tamar and his half-brother Amnon. And so we pick up in chapter 13 with the story of Amnon and Tamar. And it says

this, Now it was after this that Absalom, the son of David, had a beautiful sister whose name was Tamar. And Amnon, the son of David, loved her. And Amnon was frustrated because of his sister Tamar that he made himself ill, for she was a virgin. And it seemed hard to Amnon to do anything to her. But Amnon had a friend whose name was Jonadab, the son of Shimea, David's brother. And Jonadab,

was a very shrewd man. And he said to him, Oh, son of the king, why are you so depressed morning after morning? Will you not tell me? And Amnon said, I'm in love with Tamar, the sister of my brother Absalom. And Jonadab said to him, lie down on your bed and pretend to be ill. And when their father comes to see you, say to him, please let my sister Tamar come and give me some food to eat and let her prepare the food in my

sight that I may see it and eat from her hand. And Amnon said to him, I'm in love with Tamar, the sister of my brother Absalom. So we're introduced to the key players in this story. Absalom, who the first time we were introduced to him was the very beginning of 2 Samuel. In chapter 3, we were introduced to him as the daughter of Ahinoam, the Jezreelitist. No, excuse me. That was Amnon. We were introduced to

him as one of David's sons. Now, Amnon was the oldest of David's sons. And that's the second one that we're introduced to, and ultimately the one who should have been in line for the throne. And then we're introduced to a third person, and her name was Tamar. She was the half-sister of Amnon, but the full-blooded sister of Absalom. And we are presented with a situation that Amnon, it tells us, was in love with his sister Tamar. Now,

one of the things that tells us that the Bible is true, one of the things that points out the genuine article of the Word of God is that it has absolutely no problem telling all of the good, the bad, and the ugly of its greatest heroes. And this is one of those times where it tells us the ugly. Sometimes there are things in the Bible, and I used to tell my teenage kids this when I was teaching Bible at ACCA, there are some scenes in the Bible that are PG-13, and I have no problem giving you the PG-13 version of what takes place in Scripture. And this is one of those scenes. And so Amnon finds himself in love with his half-sister Tamar. Only the problem is what's

going on with Amnon is not actually love. You see, what Amnon actually finds himself in is in the midst of lust. He's attracted to her, and he is only attracted to her for one reason, and we'll see in just a little bit that that's exactly what was taking place. But he found that he was attracted to her physical beauty, and there was only one thing that he could imagine at that point in time, and that was what drove everything in his life, and it actually made himself, he actually made himself sick because of it. Now, I like to point out the fact that it wasn't love

with him, it was lust, because I think it's an important point that needs to be made. It's amazing how our flesh, lies to us. It's amazing what our flesh will seek to justify for us, and we'll see this happen multiple times in different scenes in this entire story. But this is exactly what's happening with Amnon. His flesh is telling him, you're in love, when what's really happening is that he's

in lust with this girl. And so he's going to do anything he can to hopefully meet his lustful desires. Well, every day he's almost making himself sick because of this. He's getting more and more depressed because of this. And instead of just putting that sin to death, he has a friend that comes along and says, hey, what's the problem? His friend named Jonadab. Now, we're

told that Jonadab was a very shrewd individual, meaning that he knew how to figure out good ways to do evil. And he was one of Amnon's cousins. And he said, what's wrong with you? Morning after morning, you look depressed every time that I see you. And he says, I'm in love with a girl that I can't have. I'm in love with a girl that I'm never going to be able to have because she's a virgin

half-sister. Which, according to the law, he's exactly right. That was absolutely against God's law. But he says, but I don't know what to do. Now, if Jonadab were a really good friend right now, he would tell him, you need to go take a cold shower and go on a run and think about something else. You need to figure out a way to cut off the flesh and quit giving yourself the option to sin.

Because friends, that's what a good friend does. When a good friend sees somebody else considering sin, they slap them in the face and they say, don't. Now, I know that sounds really harsh, but sometimes that's what we need in life, isn't it? Too many people in the world want to coddle each other in their sin. And they say, I'm really considering this sin. And they say, tell me more about your feelings. No, I don't want to know more

about your feelings. I want to tell you, don't. Run from it. Run as far away from it as you can. Run as fast from it as you can. Put your mind on something else because that's what a good friend does. And if you don't have that friend in your life, then you need to get that friend in your life. If you have a friend like Jonah who says, don't worry, I have a plan. You need to dump that

friend because that's not what a friend does. And too many of us want to surround ourselves with the people who will not challenge us for holiness. Instead, they will coddle us in our sin. They will give us the excuse that we need to continue on. Have you ever found yourself in that situation where you're just looking for that one person that will encourage you in sin? Everybody else

is saying, you know, that seems like a really bad idea. You shouldn't be doing that. You shouldn't do that. And then you keep asking more and more people until you finally find the Jonadab in your life who says, you know what? I actually think I know how you can get away with this. And we go, tell me more, right? Sometimes we're looking for that friend in our lives that will coddle us in

our sin. Instead, we need that friend who will slap us in the face and say, don't. But unfortunately, he finds Jonadab. And Jonadab comes up with this plan. He says, I have an idea for you. Here's what you need to do. You need to go lay in your bed. You need to go lay in your bed. You need to go lay in your bed and tell your dad that you're sick. And the only one who can really minister to your

needs, the only one who can really serve you is your sister Tamar. And she can come and serve you in your bed. So he comes up with this plan. It says in verse six, so Amnon lay down and he pretended to be ill. And when the king came to see him, Amnon said to the king, please let my sister Tamar come and make me a couple of cakes in my sight that I may eat from

her hand. And David sent to the house of Tamar saying, go now to your brother Amnon's house and prepare food for him. This is one of the moments in David's life where we see that he was not a perfect man. One of the many, but definitely one of the moments. Because what we see in this scene is that David is what we call an indulgent father. David did not always hold

his sons accountable. And this seems to be an issue with men in the Bible. Would you agree? With that, that there's a lot of great men in the Bible who, though they were great servants of the Lord, were terrible fathers. And they did not do a good job of holding their kids accountable. Because at this point in time, David is standing there at the bedside of his grown son,

who says, the only thing that's going to make me feel better is if my sister will serve me cakes in bed. At some point in time, he needs to say, that's the dumbest thing I've ever heard. What do you need? I'll bring it to you. You need to get over it, right? Like that's what a good would do at that point in time. They would say, no, that's it. I'm not sending you some girl that

I can tell you're attracted to. Because we can all tell, right? I'm not sending you some girl I can tell you're attracted to. I'm going to send you some guy named Lars. And he's going to be the one that will serve you cakes in bed. Because that's probably what you need right now. But he's an indulgent father. And listen, dads, I'm talking to us right now. It's so easy as we get busy in

our lives, as we get busy at work, as we get busy in ministry, as we get busy sometimes, in our hobbies, to quit being dads. And to start saying, whatever you want. I'm tired of fighting the battle. Whatever you want to do is fine with me. And we have to hold our ground. We have to continue to be the fathers that God has called for us to be. We have to continue to be the men

that God has called for us to be. Which means holding our kids accountable, listen, even when it's hard. Because I'm here to tell you right now, it's hard to hold kids accountable, especially the older they get. But that's what God has called for us to do. And that's what David fails to do here. And because of that failure, we see the next scene take place. It says in verse 7,

Everything about that scene is just wrong, right? Like, step one, she should have never been there. This is 100% Amnon's fault. I am not blaming Tamar at all. Step one, somebody should have stepped in. Step two, she should have never been there. Step three, she should have never been there. Step four, she stepped in and said, no, this seems like a bad idea. She shouldn't be

there. He made everyone else leave the room. That's a terrible idea. And then he said, come a little bit closer. Another terrible idea. Everything about this scene is wrong. But it's allowed to take place. It says, so he says, come and lie with me, my sister. But she answered him. She does the best she can here. She answered him and said, no, my brother, do not violate me. For such a thing

is not done in Israel. Do not do this disgraceful thing. As for me, where could I get rid of my reproach? And as for you, you will be like one of the fools in Israel. Now, therefore, please speak to the king, for he will not withhold me from you. However, he would not listen to her. And since he was stronger than she, he violated her and he lay with her. Again, when lust is what

rules our lives, then it will ultimately bring destruction to the lives of people around us. And this is what happens in this scene. If we don't deal with sin in our lives, then it will deal with us. And this is what happens here. And now she finds herself in this place where she has been violated by her brother. And what she knows what happens with Amnon. It says, then Amnon hated

her with a very great hatred. For the hatred with which he hated her was greater than the love with which he had loved her. And Amnon said to her, get up and go away. And she said to him, no, because this wrong and sending me away is greater than the other that you have done to me. Yet he would not listen to her. Then he called his young men, or he called his young men who

attended him and said, now throw this woman out of my presence and lock the door behind her. And she had on a long sleeved garment, for in this manner, the virgin daughters of the king dressed themselves in robes. Then his attendant took her out, locked the door behind her, and Tamar put ashes on her head and tore her long sleeved garment. And she said, no, because this wrong and sending me away is greater than the other that you have done to me. And she had on a long sleeved garment, which was on

her. She put her hand on her head and went away, crying aloud as she went. And Absalom, her brother said to her, has Amnon, your brother, been with you? But now keep silent, my sister. He is your brother. Do not take this matter to heart. So Tamar remained and was desolate in her brother Absalom's house. And when David heard of all the matters, he was very angry. But Absalom did not

speak to Amnon either good or bad, for Absalom hated Amnon. Because he had violated his sister Tamar. It came about after two full years that Absalom had sheep shears in Baal Hazor, which is near Ephraim. And Absalom invited all the king's sons. Now, because sin wasn't dealt with, sin is going to now cause a rift in David's family. Because he was unwilling to be the father that he was supposed to be, it's going to cause a rift in David's

family. And because of this, a life has been destroyed. And I want you to notice how he responded to her. And any young ladies in the room, I need you to pay attention to this. When he got what he wanted, he didn't want her anymore. That's why it's so important to understand that if a man does not love you the way that God has called for him to love you, by honoring you, by cherishing you, by keeping you pure, by making sure that God is at

the center of everything that you do, you don't want any part of him. Because once he gets what he wants, he won't be there anymore. Because that's what the flesh does. The flesh uses us up and the flesh spits us out. And it's true in every aspect of our lives. And that's what happens with her. And of course, Absalom sees her and she tears the robes that they wore at that point in time

were very symbolic of their purity. And so she takes that which is symbolic of her purity and she rips it off, not because of any act that she committed, but because of what had been committed to her, but because of what had been done to her. And she rips those sleeves off and Absalom sees her and says, what happened? Was this Amnon? He says, you don't worry about it. I'll handle it. Now, if things had been handled properly at

this point in time, because do you notice how David responded? He says, David was very angry, but I want you to notice what it does not say that David did. David did not deal with it. And we can all know why David didn't deal with it, right? Because David was guilty of a very, very similar thing. And it's really hard to stand on the moral high ground when you don't have

any moral high ground. That's why it's less important what we say, and it's more important how we live. Now, David had been restored at this point in time, and God had put him back on that moral high ground. And he could have absolutely been in that place, but he was still holding on to the shame of the sin that he committed. And he didn't feel like he could maybe take that step

that needed to be taken. And he didn't feel like he could take that step that needed to be taken. What should have happened according to the law, and if you look at both Leviticus chapter 18 and Leviticus chapter 20, you will find that the law deals with this. What should have happened is that Amnon should have been excommunicated, which according to commentators would mean that either A, he was completely cut off from the people, not allowed to live in the nation of Israel any longer, or even put to death. That's what should have happened to Amnon in a just sort of way. He

should have been brought up on charges. It should have been handled judicially, and he should have been dealt with. And he should have been brought up on charges, and he should have been dealt with. Instead, Absalom sits and lets it fester. Because did you notice how long has taken place at this point in time? Let me read it to you again. It says it came about after two full years that Absalom

had sheep shears in Baal Hazor, which is near Ephraim, and Absalom invited all the king's sons. Because what we're going to see next after this situation with Amnon and Tamar is we're going to see Absalom. Take revenge. And that story begins in verse 24. It says Absalom came to the king, and he said, Behold, now your servant has sheep shearers. Please let the king and his servants go with your

your king and his servants go with your servant. The king said to Absalom, No, my son, we should not all go. That will be a burden to you. Although he urged him, he would not go. But David blessed him. And Absalom said, If not, please let my brother, Amnon, go with us. And the king said to him, Why should he go with you? But when Absalom urged him, he let Amnon and all the king's sons go with him. Absalom commanded his servants, saying, See now,

when Amnon's heart is merry with wine, when I say to you, Strike Amnon, then put him to death. Do not fear. Have not I myself commanded you? Be courageous and valiant. Now, there was a right way to handle this, and there was a wrong way to handle this. The right way to handle this would have been for both David and Absalom to have brought up Amnon on charges and to deal with this in a judicial way. And then it could be handled the way that

God intended. But that's not what Absalom did. Because Absalom was not interested in justice. Absalom was interested in revenge. And that's exactly what we see take place here, is Absalom's going to be interested in revenge. You say, Ryan, how can you tell the difference? Because justice is met out swiftly. Revenge takes two years to plan. Because he wanted to make sure that it was done

in the most public way possible. And he takes two years to plan this. And he plans the perfect scenario. And you can just imagine how Absalom was over those two years. You can imagine how obsessed he was and how it's all he could think about. Maybe even all that he could talk about at times is how he was going to get back at his brother. And my friends, I want to tell you something.

There's a difference. There's a difference between premeditated murder and true justice. And what's about to take place is premeditated murder. We are reminded of a truth in the Bible. And the truth is, is that vengeance belongs to the Lord. Justice should be meted out by law enforcement agents. But vengeance belongs to the Lord. And we have to allow God to repay. There are times in our lives when people

hurt us. And what we find ourselves wanting to do is to take revenge upon those people. It's one of the most natural feelings that we have on the inside of us. And I'm here to tell you right now, I know exactly how hard it is to see somebody that you love and care about be injured by someone else and absolutely want to take it out on the individual that did the injuring. And I know what

it's like to have to turn that over to God and say, Lord, you're going to have to be the one that deals with that. Because if I deal with it, I'm going to jail. I know what that's like. I've worked with a lot of young people who have been injured by other people. And I know what that's like to have to hurt them. I know what that's like to have been injured by other people. And I know what that's like to have

And I'm here to tell you right now, sometimes I want to deal with it myself, but I know it's the wrong thing to do. And I've had to pray through those things before. And it's the hardest thing in the world to say, Lord, you're going to have to be the one that deals with that. Because anything that I do will not be out of justice. Anything I do will be out of vengeance. Because there's a

difference between the two. And Absalom is acting in vengeance at this point in time. So he sets up this plan. Amnon goes with him. Why Amnon went is completely baffling to me. But that's what happens. But that's why he waited two years. It says,

And then the king arose, tore his clothes, and lay on the ground. And all his servants were standing by with clothes torn. And then Jonadab, we've heard that name before, the son of Shimea, David's brother, responded, Don't let my Lord suppose that they have put to death all the young men, the king's sons. For Amnon alone is dead. Because by the intent of Absalom, this has been determined since the

day that he violated his sister Tamar. Now, is it true that Amnon is dead? Is it true that Amnon is dead? Is it true that Amnon is dead? Is it not poetic justice that the one that delivers that news to David is Jonadab? He's like, oh, don't worry. It was just Amnon. Wait, you're the dude that gave Amnon the plan that landed him in this situation. And he's like, oh, don't worry about it. It's just Amnon that died

because he violated Tamar, Absalom's sister. And again, when you have a friend that leads you into sin, they're the friend that will stab you in the back. You just need to know that, right? And so he says, don't worry. It's just Amnon that's died. And then in verse 34, it says, Now Absalom had fled. And the young man who was the watchman raised his eyes and looked. And

behold, many people were coming from the road behind him by the side of the mountain. And Jonadab said to the king, Behold, the king's sons have come. According to your servant's words, so it happened. And as soon as he had finished speaking, behold, the king's sons came and lifted their voices and wept. And also the king and all his servants wept very bitterly. And Absalom fled

and went to Talmai. The son of Amihud, the king of Geshur. And David mourned for his son every day. And Absalom fled and had gone to Geshur and was there three years. In the heart of the king, David longed to go to Absalom, for he was comforted concerning Amnon since he was dead. So for three years, Absalom is going to live with the Geshurites, which basically is his family because that's

who his mother came from, was that particular group. So he basically goes back to, some extended family. And that's where he hides out for three years. And in that entire three years, David finds himself in a really difficult position because on the one hand, Absalom did the thing that David would not. He dealt with Amnon. So on one hand, he's going, this is kind

of hard for me because he, he meted out justice that needed to be meted out. But on the other hand, he killed one of his sons and he knew it was done in cold blood. He knew it was done the wrong way. And so David finds himself in this difficult position where he's mourning for Absalom, he's mourning for Amnon, and he doesn't know what to do. My friends, do you remember the

consequences that were laid out for David after he put Uriah to death? The sword shall not depart from your house. Those unintended consequences sometimes are very steep. And so David finds himself in this position of not knowing what to do. And so over three years, he's mourning over his son, he's missing his son, Absalom, and he doesn't know what to do. But Joab comes up with a plan.

And that's what we see next is Joab's plan to bring about restoration in the family of David. It says, Now Joab, the son of Zeruiah, perceived that the king's heart was inclined toward Absalom. So Joab sent to Tekoa, and he brought a wise woman from there. And he said to her, please pretend to be a mourner and put on mourning garments now. And do not anoint yourself with oil,

but be like a woman who is mourning. And he said to her, like a woman who has been mourning for the dead many days. And then go to the king and speak to him in this manner. So Joab put the words in her mouth. And when the woman of Tekoa spoke to the king, she fell on her face to the ground, and she prostrated herself and said, help, O king. And the king said, what is your trouble? She answered, truly, I am a widow, for my husband is

dead. Your maidservant had two sons. The two of them struggled together in the field, and there was no one to separate them. So Joab said, I am a widow, for my husband is dead. And she said, one struck the other and killed him. Now, behold, the whole family has risen against your maidservant. And they say, hand over the one who struck his brother, that we may put him to death

for the life of his brother whom he killed, and destroy the heir also. Thus they will extinguish my coal which is left to me, so as to leave my husband neither name nor remnant on the face of the earth. Then the king said to the woman, go to your house, and I will give orders concerning you. The woman said to the king, O my lord, the king, the iniquity is on me and on my father's house. But the king and his throne are guiltless. So the king said, whoever speaks to you, bring him

to me, and he will not touch you anymore. Then she said, please let the king remember the Lord your God, so that the avenger of blood will not continue to destroy. Otherwise, they will destroy my son. And he said, as the Lord lives, not one hair of your son. Shall fall to the ground. Interesting, isn't it? If you really want to convince David of something, tell him a story that sounds exactly what's happening in his life, and then tell him,

you're the guy I'm actually talking about. Joab sort of took a page out of Nathan's book, because she says, hey, listen, I had two sons. One of them, they both got into a fight. One killed the other. And now everybody says, we should kill the one that's alive, because he killed your son. Only it's going to make it to where I won't have any descendants left. No one will be there to

carry on the name. And David says, don't worry, I'm going to kill the one that's alive. Don't worry, I won't let anyone harm your son. Kind of sound familiar? So David finds himself in this place where he pronounces a judgment that he knows is right, because it's not him that's doing it. And so the woman goes on to say, the woman said, please, verse 12, let your maidservant speak

a word to my Lord, the King. And he said, speak. The woman said, why then have you planned such thing against the people of God? For in speaking this word, the King is as one who is guilty, and that the King does not bring back his banished one. For we will surely die and are like water spilled on the ground, which cannot be gathered up again. Yet God does not take away life, but he plans ways so that the banished one

will not be cast out from him. Now, the reason I have come to speak this word to my Lord, the King, is that the people have made me afraid. So your maidservant said, let me now speak to the King, and perhaps the King will perform the request. And the King said, but the King will hear and deliver his maidservant from the hand of the man who would destroy both me and my son from the inheritance of God. Your maidservant said, please let the word of my Lord, the King, be comforting.

For as the angel of God, so is my Lord, the King, to discern good and evil. May the Lord, your God, be with you. And the King said, please don't hide. Anything from what I am about to ask you. And she said, speak on. And the King said, is the hand of Joab with you in all this? And the woman said, as your soul lives, my Lord, the King, no one can turn to the right or the left from anything that my Lord, the King, has spoken. Indeed, it was your

servant Joab who commanded me. And it was he who put all these words in the mouth of your maidservant in order to change the appearance of the things. Your servant Joab has done this. But my Lord is to know all that is in his hand. She goes on to tell him, so why are you doing this exact same thing? Why have you banished your son when he should be brought back in forgiveness? And she

makes this really interesting statement. Did you notice the gospel preached in verse 14? We will all surely die like water spilled on the ground, which cannot be gathered up again. Yet God does not take away life, but he plants so that the banished one will not be cast out from him. Essentially, she says, life is short and it will soon be over. But God makes a way of restoration. He makes a way of restoration for us

to him. And he's made a way of restoration for us to each other. And that's exactly what God does. God takes the ones who are banished and he provides a way for them to be made right with him. And the ultimate way that he is going to do that is through the descendant of David, which will be none other than Jesus Christ himself. But he always makes a way for those

who are banished because of their sin to be brought back to him. Brothers and sisters, that's the gospel. And in the middle of a story that is about as heartbreaking as any story in the Bible, a story about a family being torn apart by sin, we are reminded that God always makes a way for restoration. God always makes a way. To be made right with him. And it is through the blood of Jesus Christ. It is through the one

sacrifice of Jesus that God has made a way for us to be brought back into right fellowship with him. And that's the hope that we have in the midst of our own sinful lives. That's the hope that we have. And of course, he goes on to say, I have a feeling you didn't come up with this story yourself. So I want you to tell me something. I want you to be really honest. Joab tell you to do this? She's like,

dude, you're good, right? It was absolutely Joab. And he said, I know where he's going with this. And thank you for the word. So it's time to see Absalom brought back. Notice what it says. The king said to Joab, behold now, I will surely do this thing. Go therefore and bring back the young man Absalom. And Joab fell on his face to the ground. He prostrated himself. He blessed the king.

And Joab said, today your servant knows that I have found favor in your sight. Oh my Lord, the king. And that the king, has performed the request of his servant. So Joab arose and went to Gesher and brought Absalom to Jerusalem. However, the king said, let him turn to his own house and let him not see my face. So Absalom turned to his own house and did not see the king's face. Now we're going to find in just

a moment that he's going to spend another two years living in Jerusalem, still estranged, from his father. David says, I'm willing to extend the hand of forgiveness. I'm willing to bring Absalom back, but he can't come into my house. I don't want to see him. I don't want him to be around me. Now, it's kind of interesting that so much forgiveness and so much restoration had

been extended to David, and yet he's unwilling to extend it to his son. And I've, I kept asking myself all week, why? Why did David have such a hard time forgiving his son? Why does he have such a hard time really forgiving Absalom? And I think, I can't prove this scripturally, this is my own personal feeling on this. I think the reason why David has a hard

time forgiving Absalom is because David was still having a hard time forgiving himself. That's me personally. I can't prove that by what the Bible says, but I can prove it through reality. I think the reason why David was having a hard time forgiving Absalom was because when David looked at Absalom, he saw himself. And as he saw himself, he was still holding his own sin against himself. Therefore, he was having a hard time forgiving

Absalom. And I'm here to tell us right now, I think one of the reasons why so many people have a hard time forgiving other people for the things that they've done is because they refuse to allow God to forgive them. And they're walking around feeling the shame of sin in their own heart, and because they feel the shame of sin in their own heart, it's easy to project that shame onto someone else. It's easy to project that unforgiveness onto other people. And I'm here to tell you right

now, if there's someone in your life who's having a hard time forgiving Absalom, it's because they're still holding sin over their head. I would ask you, what have you not allowed God to forgive you of? What shame are you still holding onto? What guilt are you still holding onto? Because I would venture to say that that's probably why you won't extend forgiveness to someone else.

Because when we really understand forgiveness in our own heart, it's impossible to not forgive the people around us. And that, brothers and sisters, is the root of bitterness. And what we're going to see take place over these next two years is a bitterness begin to take place in the heart of Absalom that will not go away because of that unforgiveness that David refused to show to him. That will ultimately spill over into Absalom, not only seeking to take over the kingdom, but seeking to put his own father to death because of that bitterness that sprung up because of unforgiveness. Because that,

lack of grace, has a tendency to trickle down to the people around us. David has to learn an important lesson here. It says in verse 25, now before we get to the last part here, we learn a little something about Absalom. It says, Now in all Israel, no one was as handsome as Absalom. So highly praised from the sole of his foot to the crown of his head, there was no defect in him. And when he cut the hair of his head,

it was at the end of the year that he cut it, for it was heavy on him. So he cut it. He weighed the hair of his head at about 200 shekels. If I understood correctly, it was around five and a half pounds worth of hair that was hanging on that dude's melon all the time. And it says to Absalom were born three sons and one daughter whose name was Tamar. Of course,

he honored his sister by naming her Tamar. She was a beautiful appearance. Now I'm going to say one quick thing about the hair that's on Absalom's head. Okay. So one of the things that made Absalom is that he had a Jermack bounce back, beautiful hair, right? He was just like all the time, like that hair was flowing. And I'm here to tell you right now, his greatest sign of beauty, which was

his hair, the Fabio-ness of him is what will ultimately end his life. All I'm saying is, men, if you want to save your life, shave your head. That's all I'm saying. Based on what it says here in scripture, that's the best way to save your life. So Absalom lived two full years, verse 28, in Jerusalem, and he did not see the king's face. Absalom sent for Joab to send him to the king, but he would not come to him. So he sent again a

second time, but he would not come to him. Therefore he said to his servants, see Joab's field is next to mine. He's got barley in there. Go and set it on fire. Absalom's what we call a spoiled brat. So Absalom's servants set the field on fire. Dude, and I don't know why you ever jack with Joab, right? Like one of the greatest warriors in David's army, and he sets his field on fire.

Right? So Joab came and arose and came to Absalom's house and said, why have you set my field on fire? And Absalom answered Joab, because I sent for you saying, come here that I may send you to the king because you wouldn't answer my text. And said, why have I come from Gesher? It would be better for me still to be there. Now, therefore, let me see the king's face. If there is iniquity in me,

let me be put to death. So when Joab came to the king and said to him, he called for Absalom, thus he came to the king and he prostrated himself on his face to the ground before the king. And the king kissed Absalom. Ultimately, the way that David ended up forgiving Absalom and ultimately restoring him was through the work of Joab. Now, Joab was a little reluctant in this,

and it took Absalom being a little bit of a brat. But Joab is ultimately the one that convinced David to forgive Absalom. Why do I point that out? Because you and I sometimes, again, need that friend in our lives, right? Sometimes we are blind to our own sin. Have you ever noticed that? Sometimes we're blind to the bitterness that's in our own heart or the unforgiveness in our own heart. And we think,

hey, I'm doing pretty good, you know? And you need that one faithful friend who says, dude, you're holding on to a lot of bitterness. You're holding on to a lot of unforgiveness. And if you really want to know the joy of the Lord again in your life, you need to forgive. It's hard things to say. say, and it's hard things to hear, but we need that person in our lives because oftentimes we're

blind to those things. And that's what Joab was for David. Joab had his share of issues, but he was a faithful friend to David. And ultimately he said, it's time to bring Absalom home. I think that's ultimately what's going to make you happy, and that I know that's what's going to make him happy. And quite frankly, the whole kingdom is going to be better with a restored relationship

between you and Absalom. And so that's what he does. He brings him home, and he extends that true hand of forgiveness and restoration to Absalom. The only problem is, it was too little, too late. Those two years that Absalom spent in Jerusalem, stewing over the fact that his father would not restore him, would ultimately lead to a great bitterness in his life. And we continue to

see that the unintended consequences of David's sin with Bathsheba, and the murder of Uriah, keep coming back to visit him. And it's an unfortunate truth of the unintended consequences of sin. But I want to leave this on a happy note that I will always continue to leave every story about David with. And that's that in the midst of one of the most heartbreaking stories in all of the Bible, we are reminded that it would still be through David that God would send his Messiah. Do you know what we never read about in the entire New Testament?

This story. We don't read about any of it. We only hear about the great king that David was in the New Testament. We only read that he was the one through whom the Messiah would reign in the New Testament. Because the blood of Jesus Christ covers all sin. And we need to remember that God is in the business of redeeming bad families. God is in the business of redeeming family drama. God is in the business of redeeming

broken relationships, and taking what the enemy would intend for evil, and turning it into something that can be used for God's glory. Don't ever forget that in the midst of some of these painful stories to read. Because God will use this broken family, and he will use them in powerful ways. And God can use your broken family, and he can use it in powerful ways if it will be redeemed by the blood of Jesus. Amen? Let's pray. Father, we come before you, and I thank you for what your

word has to say to us. Hard as it is to read sometimes, Lord, I praise you that you have given us these stories. And I praise you for the truth of redemption that you give to us throughout your word. And so, Lord, we hold on to the grace of God in the midst of the brokenness in our own lives, knowing that your word tells us that heartache, and broken people, and ruined lives are why you died on Calvary. And so, Lord, we praise you for who you are. In Jesus' name. Amen. Be blessed.